Learning Resource Centre (Library) @ Kendriya Vidyalaya, Madurai


Any Time Any Where Information 4U



TEACHER: Who is your favorite author?

PUPIL: George Washington.

TEACHER: But George Washington never wrote any books.

PUPIL: You got it.


LIBRARIAN: Why don’t you take home a Dr. Seuss?

PUPIL: I didn’t know he made house calls.


TEACHER: How many books did you finish over the summer?

PUPIL: None. My brother stole my box of crayons.


TEACHER: How many books have you read in your lifetime?

PUPIL: I don’t know. I’m not dead yet.


TEACHER: What did you learn from your history book about Harriet Beecher Stowe?

PUPIL: If you draw a beard and a stovepipe hat on her, she looks exactly like Abraham Lincoln.


TEACHER: What does your history book tell you about the Civil War?

PUPIL: It doesn’t tell me anything. I have to read the dumb thing.


My father gave me a really cheap dictionary for my birthday.

I couldn’t find the words to thank him.


If you don’t know what the word “dictionary” means,

where would you look it up?


TEACHER: Why are you holding your textbook up to the window?

PUPIL: You told me to open it up to the Middle East.


TEACHER: Where is South America?

PUPIL: I don’t know.

TEACHER: Where is Greenland?

PUPIL: I don’t know.

TEACHER: Where is Bulgaria?

PUPIL: I don’t know.

TEACHER: Look them up in your textbook.

PUPIL: I don’t know where that is, either.


Our school librarian is very strict.

She’ll send you to the principal’s office for thinking too loudly.


Our school library is so quiet, when I’m sitting in there,

I can hear my hair grow


PUPIL: Do you have Moby Dick?

LIBRARIAN: Yes, we do.

PUPIL: I thought something smelled fishy in here.


LIBRARIAN: Did you enjoy reading Moby Dick?

PUPIL: I couldn’t finish it. I got seasick.


PUPIL: Do you have Oliver Twist in hard cover?

LIBRARIAN: Yes, we do.

PUPIL: Well, let him out; he’s a friend of mine.


TEACHER: Tell the class what book you read.

PUPIL: Black Beauty.

TEACHER: And tell the class what it was about.

PUPIL: It was about 120 pages.


LIBRARIAN: Did you enjoy reading The Hunchback of Notre Dame?

PUPIL: Well, I read the first 100 pages, then I found out it wasn’t about football.


Our school library is so quiet you can hear a pin drop and if it does;

the pin will be sent to the principal’s office.


TEACHER: Tell the class what book you read and what you thought of it.

PUPIL: I read the phone book, but I didn’t understand it. It had too many characters.


TEACHER: Tell the class what book you read and then tell them something about the plot.

PUPIL: I read “The Life of Thomas Jefferson.” He dies at the end.

My teacher says our schoolbooks are a magic carpet that will take us all over the world.

I took mine to the garage and had them fitted with seat belts.


All of my schoolbooks have pictures in them,

even if I have to draw them myself.


My teacher caught me drawing in my American Revolution textbook.

She said, “What do you think you’re doing?”

I said, “Making my mark in history.”


One of my teachers said that I should hand in my books at the end of the year better than when I got them.

What does he want me to do, add pages?


My teacher told us that books are man’s best friend,

so my dog bit him.


My teacher says we should treat our schoolbooks just like we treat one another.

So after school, I picked a fight with my History book.


MOTHER: How come you never bring any books home?

SON: Mom, they’re schoolbooks, not home books.


SON: Dad, my teacher says I should have an encyclopedia.

FATHER: Nonsense, you’ll walk to school the same as I did.


The only thing I hate worse than carrying a lot of schoolbooks home

is having to open them once I get there.


If the Good Lord wanted us to bring schoolbooks home from school,

He would have put wheels on them.

Any book with George Washington’s writing in it is worth thousands of dollars.

Any book with my writing in it is worth two weeks of detention.


My lunch leaked all over my schoolbooks.

I now have the only geography book where the map of Turkey is covered with gravy.


We have to carry heavy books home, then we have to carry heavy books back to school in the morning.

If the authorities knew this was going to happen, why didn’t they build the school closer to us?


What do librarians hang over their babies’ cribs?



What has a spine but no bones?

A book.


Why did the Rumanian stop reading for the night?

To give his Bucharest (book a rest).


Why was the library so messy?

Because it was full of litter ature.


What would you get if you crossed a comedian and an Edgar Allan Poe story?

The wit and the pendulum.


What would you get if you crossed a locomotive with the author of Tom Sawyer?

A choo choo Twain.


How did the author of Tom Sawyer learn to ride a bicycle?

With Twain ing wheels.


Did you read the dachshund’s autobiography?

It’s a long story.


What happened when the bloodhound wrote his autobiography?

It got on the best smeller list.


What books were ordered from Prague?

Czech (check) books.


Which mythological character carried the maps?



What was the name of the book about a trio of adventurous French cows?

The Three Moo sketeers.


What book is about a rodent pioneer?

“Little Mouse on the Prairie.”


What did they call Tom Sawyer’s friend after he lost a lot of weight?

“Huckleberry thin (Finn).”


What do Peter Pan and noon have in common?

Neither have a shadow.



Filed under: BOOK JOKES & HUMOUR, Library Jokes, , ,

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

Dear Visitors,

This is the official blog of Library and Media centre of Kendriya Vidyalaya, No.1, Madurai. This is an attempt to provide online service to the users community with the motive of 'Any time information' ' Anywhere information'. Feel free to express your comments and suggestions.

50 Years of KVS

Library blog visits:

  • 4,312,185 users

Thank You, On-line readers

Our library blog gets going with more than 12,00,000 hits. Whole- hearted thanks to all the students, staff and friends who made this great thing to happen. Keep giving your support for our growth. Thanks Apenty from your K.Ramasamy, Librarian

Contact Particulars

Lunch: 11:30 am - 12:oo noon
II Saturday and Sunday - Holidays

Joyful NBW Celebrations 2013

National Book Week, 14-20 Nov.2013

KVS Foundation Day Dec. 15, 2013

GokulashtamiDecember 15th, 2013
Let this Rama Navami bring more devotion in our reading degree !!!

Best Entries : Drawing and Book cover Designing Competition

Come on Readers, Let's celebrate the books

Library Tweets

  • Over 1000 Class 1 Forms Issued at KV No.1 Narimedu wp.me/pYEHW-10lTweeted on 3 years ago
  • Special Coaching for Slow Learners at KV No.1 Narimedu wp.me/pYEHW-10jTweeted on 3 years ago
  • 16/11/2013: Pravin, Dharani and Team from IX C presented a humorous skit on ' Tongue Twisters and Pallindromes'. (NBW 2013)Tweeted on 4 years ago
  • 16/11/2013: Srivathsan of Class XI A1 presented a speech on ' Does fiction reading help you anyway'. (NBW 2013)Tweeted on 4 years ago
  • 16/11/2013: A book quiz was conducted by Ram Balaji and Madhan Krishna of VIII A. ( NBW 2013).Tweeted on 4 years ago
  • 15/11/2013: Monisha Raghunathan and Ramajayam of Class IX D presented a heap of funny titles in the inaugural ceremony.Tweeted on 4 years ago
  • 15/11/2013: Aarthi of Class XI B shared the news about ' Library of Congress' - the largest library in the world.Tweeted on 4 years ago
  • 15/11/2013: Gayathri and Sandhya of Class IX C delivered a talk on ' Prolegomena to National Book Week'.Tweeted on 4 years ago
  • 15/11/2013: Inauguration of National Book Week, 2013 in KV Narimedu, Madurai at 9:00 am. Principal Shri.C.Muthiah inaugurated the NBW 2013.Tweeted on 4 years ago
  • Class X : Summative Assessment 1 - Sample Papers wp.me/pYEHW-ZoTweeted on 4 years ago


Your Suggestions

Mail your suggestion to ramasamylibkvm@gmail.com

Call the Librarian




October 2011
« Sep   Nov »

Blog developed and maintained by K.Ramasamy, Librarian, KV Madurai


Happy New Year 2014

National Book Week, 14-20, Nov.2013

Happy Book Week , My dear Readers !!! Expand your horizon of knoweledge via books........all through.......always....all ways

National Book Week, Nov.14-20, 2013

National Book Week, 14-20, Nov.2014

National Book Week, 2013

Read this Blog in Hindi

Read this Blog in Tamil

National Book Day upto

World Book DayNovember 20th, 2013
Let this World Book Week bring more goodness in our library use habits !!!

New Arrivals

Del.icio.us Bookmarks

Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

Join 593 other followers

RSS NDTV India News

  • An error has occurred; the feed is probably down. Try again later.

RSS Cricketnext

  • An error has occurred; the feed is probably down. Try again later.


  • An error has occurred; the feed is probably down. Try again later.

RSS Blog for Scouts & Guides

  • Amendments made on 30/11/2014 – Guide Section
    Amendments made on 30/11/2014 – Guide Section Please click the following link to get amendments made in APRO III Guide section on 30/11/2014. APRO Part III – Guide Section Advertisements
  • Amendments made on 30/11/2014 – Scout Section
    Amendments made on 30/11/2014 – Scout Section Please click the following link to get the amendments made in APRO Part II – for scouts APRO Part II – Scout Section
  • E-Books on Compass
    Two books on Compass 1) js_s_map-and-compass 2) mapcompass
  • Scout Quizzzzzzzzzzzzz
    BADEN POWELL AND SCOUTING 1. Who is the founder of Scouting / Guiding? Lord Baden Powell of Gilwell. 2. Where was Baden-Powell born? When? In Gilwell, on Feb 22, 1857. 3. What the full name B.P? Robert Stephenson Smyth Baden-Powell. 4. Who was B.P’s mother? Daughter of the British Admiral W. T. Sonyth. 5. Who […]
  • Scout Quiz Questions 4 U
    Some Scout Quiz Questions to Ponder………. I Set 1. What was Baden-Powell’s Christian name? Robert Richard Rupert 2. In which year was B-P born? 1847 1857 1927 3. What was the name of the town in South Africa BP saved whilst in the Army? Mafeking Mafeprince Mafequeen 4. On his return to England, BP wrote […]
%d bloggers like this: